Thirty Nine: Shelter From The Storm

36

37

38

And now Thirty Nine. As much as I found 37 anticipating great changes and uncertainty, I can certainly say that 38 will be remembered as the year that brought a storm into my life. And what a storm it was. I found myself in the midst of a financial storm almost exactly 12 months before the same reality came true for everybody. I have made it through.....so far. It's in my rear view for the most part these days and I find myself wonder, "Hey dude, do know how close you were to the edge of that cliff?" However, as bad as it was, it went by so quickly and now feels like a month. Also looking back, I sure did spend a LOT of time by myself last year and I suppose that is a product of the day to day being at home or out somewhere doing the job search. Was that a whole year? I suppose that it was pretty much.

An old friend, Julie, recently had her husband get laid off from his job so he is now at home with the kids as she goes to work. I recall her saying that it is a good thing in that this was "an opportunity to spend time with the kids." I wonder what my opportunity was last year and if I missed it. Was a month in Spain in order and I just totally missed out on the chance to do that? Well I guess we will never know.

Right now 39 is being built and established on faith and there is not much more than I can say about it. I have a contract job that I could be let go from at any time. I have faith that this will become something permanent. I have my health, happiness and a home that I love. I have faith that my job will allow me to maintain my life and maybe I will fall in love along the way. I am blessed with good friends at every turn. I have faith that they will be blessed with good jobs and healthy families. I have seen my mother overcome some pretty incredible things time past year. I have faith that God will continue to bless her to be in my life.

There is so much going on in our world right now and I think this will certainly be a time that I will reflect back on. As shaky as it's all been, I think that I might actually look back and say that I came through this OK. Maybe. What's ahead for 39? I am not gonna guess cause I suppose that would take the fun out of it. But to celebrate, I hope to be able to go jump my ass off this weekend.


Suddenly he turned around and she was standing there
With silver bracelets on her wrists and flowers in her hair
She walked up to him so gracefully and took his crown of thorns
"Come in" she said "I'll give you shelter from the storm"

Jerry's Wedding, Cabo San Lucas

"That the woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not made out of his head to rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be beloved."

Head Down And Focused

That is what I am all about these days. Work hard. Work even harder.

There is so much going on these days in the broader economy and not too long ago I was caught up in the middle of it all looking for a job. I am so thankful now for my contract gig. But it's kinda funny, since starting the job, I have had stumbling block after stumbling block pop up to bite me. And this has happened time and time again, most often it's hitting me in the wallet (like my car getting hit). Car, house, car, house it's just gone on and on. Feb and March have been very expensive.

But you know what, I think you could burn my house down tomorrow and I think that I could find a way to go on and tell myself, "Meh, no big deal. Just gotta go to work tomorrow and be thankful."

Didn't We Go Through This Already

This looks a lot like

This

Same garage.
Same corner of the car.
No note left.

I walked out to my car this afternoon about 6:30 and this is what I found in the garage.
Thanks.

What's For Dinner: Veal

Veal chop with mushroom risotto.

My Seat Was Taken

Stopped by the usual neighborhood coffee spot that I spent so many mornings before I started my current contract role. I always had the same seat at the table right in front of the TV showing ESPN 2......mmmmm Sage Steele mmmm. Anyway. Well there was somebody else sitting there today. A man a few years older than me and it surely looked like he was on his computer looking for a job.

I can't say the the torch has been passed to him yet but I do wish him the best. Somehow I kinda wanted to just say hello or introduce myself, but then it would have been weird. I suppose we figure out our paths in our own way and I hope that his is around the corner.

Our Uglier Side

You know I will never forget walking into my neighborhood Publix and seeing it cleaned out completely from wall to wall after a Hurricane when I lived in Florida. Everything. Gone. All of it. Gone. I kinda had to stop and think, "So this is how it goes down at the end of days.....we horde toilet paper, potted meat, and diet cherry cream soda with lime.......we fight for a spot waiting hours to top off our tanks with gas" I kinda feel that way right now.

Look around your day to day life. People everywhere are hurting and the priorities are all wrong. Seeing and hearing anger every day has led me to really understand the bigger picture. People have lost jobs, lost a lot of money, there is no job security, financial markets are down and spiraling, government is attempting to grasp that which cannot likely be grasped. Let's all just calm down for a moment. It's not the democrat's fault. It's not the republican's fault. It's not the immigrant's fault. We are too busy looking for somebody to blame that anger has become a weapon aimed at anybody and everybody that is not like us and thinks the same way. We all have a hand in where we are and we are all being affected by the corporate greed and retail society that we all so willingly sold our souls into just because somebody told us that we could be on a reality TV show and have five minutes of fame.

You see, we own this mess.

I will even let the world in on a little known secret - it won't get better until we decide to stop looking for somebody to blame and solve our problem by stopping to give and help each other out. A darker day is indeed coming more than likely. A major financial is likely to fail resulting in the market making an unprecedented correction. Q1 earnings will be horrific leading to more blood on the streets and in the markets. Let's just get a grasp on these things now. However, we are defined by how we handle bad times, so don't forget to look in the mirror when that day comes.

Do YOU like the person looking back at you?

"God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off. "

I think Tyler was on to something. I love that movie for a reason.