It's Not You, It's Me
"He was really so surprised that you had not found something. He is quite impressed with your resume/education etc. (He is not alone in that)"
Welcome to 2009
You might call this a "more of the same" post for me as it is another absolutely unbelievable yet true story of my turmoil. This is sorta like working for Enron all over again in that I would have much rather read the book or seen the move vs actually going through the experience. More so, if I had not gone through the last couple of weeks, I would not have believed this myself.
The last few weeks I started back at one of the private equity shops that I was with previously in a contract role. They needed somebody to help out with the process raising debt for the renewable power plant that I helped out with before. These guys are super nice and really appreciate me as much as I appreciate and like working for them. The plan would be for work through Feb, maybe March starting mid Dec. A real possibility for contract work through six months was actually on the table depending on the path for this asset. Who knows, folding into a permanent role with the asset or a portfolio company....
That all ended today when unforeseen issues came up. There will be a different path taken for this asset and raising debt and equity that is completely influenced by the larger market situation. They did not want this for me, nor did I, but when the ax man comes, you gotta answer the door. One good thing is that if there is another window for work on this asset, I think that I will be the guy who gets the call.
So how do you even get excited about anything anymore in this market? What is real? At what point can I say this is over? Here was a cool contract opportunity that was going to provide some income even if it did not prove to be the last stop for me on this journey. It was something. It was a place that I was respected and regarded and just as much as this was taken from me, you could say it was taken from my employers as well. I am tired. I am running out of options. I have seen people blow up trading books, get indicted on trading violations and fraud, blow up businesses and yet they get chances again and again.
Look people, I am looking for one, ONE shot. Do I have to go through another year of this? News flash, not gonna make it that long.
Welcome to 2009
You might call this a "more of the same" post for me as it is another absolutely unbelievable yet true story of my turmoil. This is sorta like working for Enron all over again in that I would have much rather read the book or seen the move vs actually going through the experience. More so, if I had not gone through the last couple of weeks, I would not have believed this myself.
The last few weeks I started back at one of the private equity shops that I was with previously in a contract role. They needed somebody to help out with the process raising debt for the renewable power plant that I helped out with before. These guys are super nice and really appreciate me as much as I appreciate and like working for them. The plan would be for work through Feb, maybe March starting mid Dec. A real possibility for contract work through six months was actually on the table depending on the path for this asset. Who knows, folding into a permanent role with the asset or a portfolio company....
That all ended today when unforeseen issues came up. There will be a different path taken for this asset and raising debt and equity that is completely influenced by the larger market situation. They did not want this for me, nor did I, but when the ax man comes, you gotta answer the door. One good thing is that if there is another window for work on this asset, I think that I will be the guy who gets the call.
So how do you even get excited about anything anymore in this market? What is real? At what point can I say this is over? Here was a cool contract opportunity that was going to provide some income even if it did not prove to be the last stop for me on this journey. It was something. It was a place that I was respected and regarded and just as much as this was taken from me, you could say it was taken from my employers as well. I am tired. I am running out of options. I have seen people blow up trading books, get indicted on trading violations and fraud, blow up businesses and yet they get chances again and again.
Look people, I am looking for one, ONE shot. Do I have to go through another year of this? News flash, not gonna make it that long.
posted by Booster MPS at
9:08 PM
5 Comments:
sigh.
sorry to hear the axe man came knockin' at your door. that totally sucks.
i hope this year is your year. i really truly do.
I'm thinking it will be a good year. Gotta keep thinking it.
My bro in FL has been hunting for almost 2 years now as well. He is doing a small (SMALL) contract job... he has no idea if it will last.
It's bad everywhere.
Don't give up! You got it, babe!
i don't want to tell you "huggy" right now. i want to literally wrap my arms around you. to say this must be beyond frustrating i'm sure is putting it mildly.
watch this video. as soon as i saw it..i thought of you. my heart was racing...
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